Missing Two Years M7 OW
by senorabutterfly
Summary: My version of why Chris and Buck had different ideas of how long they'd known each other in Love and Honor. Might need a tissue warning, depending on how sensitive you are. Not mine, no profit made.


Missing Two Years M7 OW

Buck looked at JD curiously. The kid hadn't spoken in a while and had a thoughtful look on his face as he and the ladies' man sat in the mostly empty saloon. Buck was still taking it easy after his wounds from Don Paulo and the younger man was keeping him company now that his patrol was over.

"Whatcha thinkin' about JD?"

"Huh?" Dunne glanced up after a few seconds, as if just realizing that he'd been spoken to.

"Asked what you're thinkin' about. You ain't been gabbin' my ear off the last lil' bit." Buck leaned back in his chair and cradled his lukewarm beer in his hands.

JD got a slightly embarrassed expression on his mobile face and didn't answer right away. That only made Wilmington more curious.

"It's alright JD. What's on your mind?"

The smaller man looked at him with serious, if somewhat confused, eyes.

"I've just been wonderin' . . . how can you and Chris think you've known each other a different amount of time? I mean . . . I know it's been a long while, but I'd think meetin' each other would stand out. I know I'll remember when I met you guys until I die."

Buck set his chair back down on all four legs and gave a sigh. The affable brunet looked around to see who was in the saloon as he turned serious. He and JD had the whole place to themselves except for Inez, who was wiping down glasses behind the bar and was too far away to hear unless they raised their voices.

Taking a deep breath, Wilmington started speaking softly. Long arms leaned carefully on the scarred top of the wooden table.

"Reckon we remember it differently 'cause a' the time after Sarah and Adam were killed."

JD looked even more confused, so the ladies' man continued even more quietly.

"Chris and I met in the war, when I was transferred into his unit a year or two before the end. That was before he met Sarah. After we got out, we stayed together and decided to head west since Chris had a hankerin' to have his own horse ranch and everything where we were was torn to bits by the fightin'."

Dunne nodded in understanding. He wasn't even a teenager during that time, and had lived far enough north that there hadn't been any skirmishes near him, but he'd actually given some consideration to trying to get on as a drummer, except his ma was too sick by then.

The taller man took a sip of his drink without really even tasting it.

"It was after we got out here that Chris met Sarah. That girl was crazy about the ol' war dog and he fell head over heels for her, too." A fond smile of remembrance curved the lanky figure's lips under the dark mustache. He was quiet a minute as scenes from that time played through his mind. It almost seemed like a dream now.

"Anyway, Sarah and I got along great too, and Chris didn't mind me stayin' around as long as I gave 'em their privacy. I was helpin' him with the horses, so we just sort-of fell into a routine. I'd stay at the ranch through the week, then I'd head into town on Friday night so the lovebirds could have some time to themselves."

He gave a bob of his eyebrows and a big grin.

"Reckon they made good use of it too. Wasn't long before Adam came along."

He paused again, more memories flitting through his mind . . . of Chris holding Adam right after he was born, a smile as big as Texas on his face and pride radiating off of him . . . of Buck himself putting the small boy on the horse in front of him and riding him around to Adam's delighted squeals. One of Adam's first words had been 'pony', in fact.

JD cleared his throat when it began to look like Buck wasn't going to take his story back up anytime soon. The kid understood, but this still hadn't explained the mystery of the different number of years between Chris and Buck, and JD really wanted to understand. He didn't know why it mattered to him so much, but for some reason it did.

Wilmington glanced up when he realized that he'd just abandoned his story in mid-stream so to speak. The smile left his face and the handsome visage became somber and sad as his mind moved on to what had happened later.

He nodded slightly to JD in apology for pausing and then continued, his voice solemn and amazingly soft for him.

"Things were great for about five years after that. The ranch prospered, Chris gettin' a reputation for good horses that even traveled as far as Mexico. He and Sarah were totally in love and really happy to have Adam, who called me 'Uncle Buck'. Sarah was even talkin' about havin' another baby, teasin' Chris about it and tellin' me I might have to go to town more often." A wistful smile curved the attractive mouth for a moment, then he pressed his lips together and swallowed audibly. The next part was hard to even remember, much less put into words.

"Like I said, the ranch's reputation for good horseflesh had spread by then. Chris got an offer from a guy in Mexico to buy some of his horses. Sarah wasn't happy about us goin' so far away, but she understood. Adam wanted to go too, and it nearly broke Chris' heart to tell him he had to stay. He tried to make it better by tellin' Adam that he'd be the man of the house for a while and to take care of his momma." Another swallow made him stop, and the cobalt eyes closed for a minute to hide the pain inside. Chris now seemed to have forgiven Buck for his part in what happened, but the lanky form wasn't sure he could ever forgive himself.

"Chris and I took the horses down to Mexico and the guy paid us off in cash. First thing we did after that was head to town to get somethin' to cut the trail dust. We got rooms for the night, and Chris was all for headin' back the next mornin'. I'd found a pretty lil' señorita t' spend some time with though, and she begged me to stay another day. So I talked Chris into another night by mentionin' that our horses could use the rest and that he might could drum up some more business for the ranch while we were there."

A deep sigh then moved the broad shoulders as he stared into his half-empty mug. A desolate expression took over the handsome face.

"Once we got back, we knew somethin' was wrong before we ever topped the rise where we could see the house. You could still smell smoke on the wind and ash was floatin' around . .."

He suddenly took a deep swallow of the tepid beer, draining the glass in one move to try to moisten his dry throat that felt as arid as Chris' place had when they saw it. A drop of moisture dripped from the corner of one eye, and the ladies' man didn't even try to wipe it away.

JD's mouth was now dry too as he envisioned what it must have been like for Chris to find his home destroyed and his beloved wife and son dead. And he ached for Buck, who he knew felt responsible in a way.

Wilmington cleared his throat to try to get the lump out of it.

"You can imagine how hard that hit Chris. He was devastated. And I was too. I was in shock for days . . . just couldn't believe it had happened and couldn't shake the thought that if we'd just come back when Chris wanted to, that we could have stopped it from happenin'. I blamed myself, and at the time so did he. He was filled with grief and anger . . . picturin' Sarah reachin' out for him and Adam callin' to him, since she had her hand stretched out when we finally uncovered the bodies. He wanted revenge on whoever he could get his hands on, includin' me. I stayed around for a while, lettin' him use me for a punchin' bag when he was drunk, and cryin' with him when he was sober. And I tried to keep him out of fights with others, 'cause he was so filled with grief and rage. It was like he was tryin' to get killed so he could join Sarah and Adam, but he was just too fast and too good a shot for anyone to beat him."

JD ventured a question then.

"So why did you go off and leave him?"

Buck twirled his now empty glass around absently, eyes seeming to see something far off in the distance.

"I finally realized that my presence wasn't helpin' him heal any. And he packs a wicked punch. Was afraid he'd end up breakin' my jaw or somethin' if I kept lettin' him hit me, but was too full of guilt myself to fight back. And he'd gone from burnin' anger to a cold, icy detachment most of the time. The friend that I'd known . . . the one with the ready smile and sense of humor . . . was gone. In his place was a dangerous gunman who was willin' to fight at the drop of a hat, and sometimes to throw the hat down himself. Not that Chris ever shot someone just because they looked at him wrong or anything. But if they wanted to call him out, he'd beat 'em to the street. He'd about figured out that he wasn't likely to get killed himself unless he just let someone shoot 'im, and his body wouldn't let him stand there without defendin' himself. But I guess part of him still hoped that he'd meet someone faster than him so he could go be with Sarah and Adam. I couldn't stop him, and I couldn't stand to hang around and watch, so I finally just left him to himself and moved on. Still kept an ear out for news of him though, and believe me there was plenty! Didn't take long for the name Chris Larabee and the dark clothes he'd taken to wearin' in mournin' to become famous. In the time I was away from him, he pretty much turned into a legend. People told stories about him everywhere I went. His shootouts made headlines in the papers hundreds miles away from where he was. Chris had always been good with a gun, but it was like I didn't even know this Larabee, the feared gun hand and 'man in black'.

Buck paused again, lost in thought for a few minutes.

"Then I began to notice that the news accounts and such had started describin' him as still wearin' the black, but sometimes they mentioned different colored shirts. And he didn't seem to be actively picking so many fights, but he'd gotten such a reputation that folks had started callin' him out just to see if they were faster, and Chris never did take stupidity well or back down if he was seriously challenged. Sarah had a calming influence on him, but he's always been dangerous if provoked and had a tendency to just walk straight into trouble without duckin' or flinchin'. I'd taken a string of odd jobs to keep myself in spendin' money, and was even workin' as a lawman for a while. I kinda wanted to see Chris, but kept hopin' he didn't come to any place where I was supposed to keep the peace, since I didn't want to have to run him outta town just because he was a known gun hand and would probably end up in a gunfight."

The tall figure got up and stretched and then ambled to the bar to get another beer while JD fidgeted, hoping that wasn't the end of the story. Buck still hadn't answered his original question.

Sitting back down when he returned to the table, the ladies' man took a deep drink of his beer and then began speaking again.

"I decided to give up on the lawman thing partly because of that. I was kinda goin' in the same direction as Chris, stayin' out of sight, but keepin' up with him too. Guess I'd watched his back for so long, that I just couldn't completely give it up. I'd come into a town a little before or after him, hangin' around until I knew he was alright. He's always been observant and had good instincts, so I figured he probably knew I was around, but we never met up face to face. I could tell though that he seemed to be gettin' at least a little back to his old self, since folks would tell me about what he was doin' when I got to a town, and it wasn't actively pickin' trouble. When he headed this way, I decided to ride ahead, since we were gettin' pretty close to his old ranch and I wasn't sure how he'd handle that. Didn't plan on meetin' him, but as we know things turned out different than I'd figured. And I'm mighty glad they did. He's slowly gettin' back to his old self in some ways. He won't ever be the same since Sarah and Adam are gone, but he's not a stone cold killer like some folks make him out to be, either. Doubt he'll ever lose the reputation, but I reckon he wears the black pants and such now as much in habit, and because it tends to make folks think twice about confrontin' him."

JD opened his mouth, but Buck stopped him before he could protest that he still didn't know the answer to his question.

"So as to why Chris and I have different notions on how long we've known each other, I'm countin' the two years in between leavin' and gettin' back in with him here. Reckon to Chris those two years are more of a blur, and his mind doesn't really recognize 'em. Especially since we weren't ridin' together durin' 'em. I was keepin' up with him durin' that period, so to me it still counts as the time we've known each other. Not sure I was even in his mind then though, so he's likely countin' the years we were actually together, which is two years less."

JD finally nodded. That made sense. And it did explain those missing two years. A smile curved up his lips as he swallowed the last of his milk. He was just glad the two old friends were together now, and that they'd joined the rest to become the Magnificent Seven. While he was sorry for the past tragedy, he wouldn't have it any other way!

By DMA


End file.
